Amy Writes

When asked how someone could pray for me this week, I asked for victory. I just wanted to see some victory, somewhere. I was feeling a little defeated. A little beat up. I'd had a rejection or two in Auction World. Some frustrations with the kids. Some disappointing results on the scale and with the measuring tape. But sitting in spin class this morning, I was convicted. I was convicted because I was sitting in spin class, at 6 a.m. That was a victory over my sheets and snooze button. And I finished the spin class strong. That was a victory over my pounding heart and burning leg muscles. I caught a glimpse in the mirror and noticed that I was wearing tight-ish yoga pants and a clingy tank top. That was a victory over insecurity. I came home to two sweet kids and a wonderful husband who were feeding themselves breakfast with lunch already made. Victory over martyrdom. I swept the floor. Victory over crumbs and that feeling that I get when I step on them barefoot. I showered, a long,

1. I will drink at least 8 full glasses of water each day. 2. I will exercise 5 days, including a 6 a.m. spin class on Wednesday. 3. At least 2 of my snacks each day will be fresh fruit or veggies.

With all of this talk of goals - training goals, fitness goals, shape & measurement goals - I must be careful to remember that goals met = rewards. Or at least it should work that way. So I need to be prepared! And it must not be something edible! I cannot reward myself with Ice Cream when the next jeans fit. This seems like it should be easy, but I'm coming up short. My inner administrator would like to create a chart illustrating the reward schedule. I would like the option to forego smaller rewards and roll them into bigger rewards. I would like to devise some type of point plan where I receive instant rewards for passing up empty calories... (i.e. passing up ice cream = 3 points; 15 points = an hour of "me" time.) But I haven't done that yet, because I can't come up with enough appropriate rewards. I think this is because I am not very good at rewarding myself, at least not with the universally accepted "mom rewards." I loathe shopping for clothe

I had an epiphany today. I realized why I have never been successful at staying fit. It's going to seem like a no-brainer to you. But here it is: I have never made it a lifestyle. Ta-Da! And what's more - I realized today that I have never made anything a lifestyle. At least not permanently. I always have this sense that there are so many things in my life that I would be really good at ... If I would just commit myself to them. But my pattern isn't one of commitment. My pattern is one of distractedness. I learn to do something, I do it compulsively, then I place it in the "tried it" column and move on. In my head, I am still a pianist/volleyball player/tennis player/avid reader/writer/ancestry buff/crocheter/baker/cake decorator/scrapbooker... but if I'm truly honest with myself, I can really only say that those are things that I can do. Some of those activities see a little more time in my schedule than others, but none of them are a part of my day-to-day

My watch is loose. Well, loose-er. This is great news, of course, because it means that somewhere, finally, some of me is disappearing. And, just like every girl out there, I've always been very self-conscious about that unsightly fat that gathers around my wrists. I am impatient. So to show my impatience who was boss this week, I decided NOT to weigh in on Monday. I decided I would relax a bit, give myself another week or so before weighing and measuring again. The truth here is that I just didn't want to be disappointed again. I wasn't feeling particularly victorious this week, in spite of walking 112 miles through Disney this weekend and passing up every Mickey Ice Cream Bar, Churro and french fry on property. So I gave myself a break. And I didn't hop on the scale. Until after lunch. AFTER lunch, which is also AFTER breakfast (that's 2 meals now in my belly) and AFTER a considerable amount of fluid consumption. And guess what? The scale was lower. Surprisingly l